Managing across the generational divide November 11, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Building relationshiops, Business coaching, Management.Tags: flex time, empowerment, motivating employees, Generation X, Generation Y, Millennials, Baby Boomers, values, causes, goals, latch-key kids
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Jackie Harder
Do you have employees you just flat out don’t understand?
Consider the manager who was trying to increase retail sales, a small sideline to his core business.
He came up with a great plan – or so he thought – to encourage competition within his staff by promising bonuses to the clerk who made the most sales each month.
His employees, women who worked to supplement their post-retirement income, listened to his pep talk, nodded politely and quietly went back to their tasks.
Several days later, one of his employees asked for a chat.
“We’ve been thinking,” said the group’s spokesman. “We’ll do our best to sell more, but we don’t want to compete against each other. We’re all friends and we don’t want to create any problems. Is that OK?”
It wasn’t that these women couldn’t use the money; money is tight for everyone these days. It’s just that they valued their relationships more than they were motivated by cash.
The manager – a Baby Boomer, a full generation younger than his staff – was astounded. Wasn’t everyone chasing the almighty dollar?
But he went back to the drawing board and came up with a solution that met his needs and motivated the staff:
His new plan rewarded all his employees when they reached a certain sales goal each month. He put money into an account for them to use as they saw fit…as a group.
The more they exceeded their goals, the more bonus money he contributed…to the group.
They could decide among themselves how they’d spend it. Should they use it as it came in, treating themselves to lunch? Or maybe let it grow for a few months for a special dinner or a shopping trip?
His new plan honored the importance of their relationships and his so-called “Veteran Generation” staff was happy to work – and be rewarded – as a team, toward a common goal.
The happy result is that the boss got what he wanted, too.
Motivating workers is one of the most difficult jobs on a manager’s to-do list.
Boomer managers in particular don’t have a lot of patience for the working styles of younger generations.
Gen X’ers especially drive them nuts. Workers born between 1965 and 1979 were the first latch-key kids. They have experienced, first hand, how “nose to the grindstone,” corporate-ladder climbing affected their parents and their home lives.
And they don’t want any part of it.
They insist on having a personal life; if you want to motivate them, offer them workplace flexibility, like more time off or the ability to create their own hours.
Show you value them by giving them all the latest tech toys you can provide.
Millennials, also known as Generation Y, were born between 1980 and 1994. They are more “touchy-feely” than previous generations.
These employees want to grow, learn and make a difference. They want to have an impact not just in the workplace, but in the world…a world much smaller, thanks to the Internet, than the Boomers wanted to change.
And like the Veteran Generation, Millennials are less motivated by money than by having a full and satisfying personal life.
Get their best by supporting their involvement in the causes they value. Show an interest in their personal goals and clearly show they mesh with company goals.
These are broad strokes, of course, and there always will be exceptions.
But if you use these generalities as a starting point to discover how to get the most from your workforce, you’ll grow them and your business at the same time.
What you feel is what you get October 2, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Life coaching.Tags: coaching, positive attitude
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Jackie Harder
What one thing that you don’t have in your life would make a huge difference to you if you did?
How would your life be different? How would that affect the significant people in your life?
These questions help my coaching clients focus on where they are right now, where they want to be and – most importantly – what it will feel like once they get there.
The first question is the easiest to answer. A new car, a nicer home, a loving relationship, a million dollars, a great job, their own business…most people have no problem coming up with at least one thing that would make a huge difference in their lives.
It’s exploring the answers to the other two questions that can get dicey.
How your life would be different takes a certain amount of drilling down.
For the purposes of discussion, let’s take the million-dollar answer and explore it a bit more.
How would your life be different if you had a million dollars?
You could probably afford a nice house and a new car (or two), pay off your bills, put some money away in a retirement account, invest a chunk, help your aged parents or help launch your children on a new life, travel to exotic locales, dine in the finest restaurants, buy a great boat…the list may be so large that your million-dollar windfall would begin to look puny!
Now imagine how it would feel to you to have these things in your life. Would you feel happy? Good? Content? Wise? Proud? Secure? Magnanimous?
Take some time to delve into it. Keep digging.
You may learn that many of the things you want in your life will bring you to the same emotional place. That’s a powerful lesson for you, and something to keep in mind.
Feelings are important because they are the impetus drives you forward to reach any goal. The things you want – whatever they may be – are only the outer manifestation of what it is you want to feel when you get those things.
Now imagine how the important people in your life would be affected if you got that million dollars.
What would happen with your family? Would your spouse or lover be jealous of your newfound wealth? How would your best friend react?
How would you handle it? Would any of it matter to you?
If you feel that having a million dollars is way out of your realm of possibilities (at least at this time), look at something that really resonates with you and go through the exercise again.
How would you feel if you got that really great job you’ve been wanting? How would your family and friends feel about it? Would they be excited for you? Would they support you in your new position? Would they be angry that you would have to move or spend less time with them?
If you’re serious about getting that one big thing in your life, it’s worth talking about. Make sure they want for you what you want for yourself. And then decide whether the trade-offs are worth it.
If you’d like support in getting that one thing that would make a huge difference in your life – even a million dollars! – consult a coach.
High tech vs. high touch September 21, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Corporate coaching.Tags: business cards, elevator speeches, high tech, networking, online business networking, referral, relationshp marketing, social networking, technology, viral, word of mouth
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Jackie Harder
Is your business high tech or high touch?
Both have their place, but relying completely on the former is inviting doom.
The best application of technology is transparent to the public, and is put in place to give employees more opportunity to enhance the oh-so-important personal element – high touch – with their customers.
Some of those invisible high-tech solutions may be as simple as networking office computers and printers, software that tracks sales and inventory, and voice mail.
But don’t go nuts on the technology side. The last thing you want is hardware replacing people in areas where you want and need that human touch.
It’s a huge turn off to call a local business – which has a dozen employees, max – during regular business hours and hear, “Thank you for calling the ABC Co. Our hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday. We are located at 123 Elm Drive. If you know your party’s extension, please dial it now. If you know your party’s last name, please enter the first three letters of that person’s last name. If you have no idea who you’re calling or why, please…”
OK, so maybe I’m exaggerating on that last one…but just a little!
Phone answering systems should be used only outside of regular business hours.
Why? Because people want to talk to people, not to machines.
I’ll never forget the call I picked up, only to hear the caller yell at someone in the background, “Hey! I got a real live person!”
It’s a sad state of (business) affairs when getting a “real live person” on the phone is the exception than the rule.
Part of every business owner or manager’s high-touch regime should be face-to-face, “real live people” networking.
Why? Because people do business with people they know, not with machines.
And that’s where small businesses have a huge advantage over conglomerates. Take advantage of it.
Networking – also called referral, word-of-mouth, viral and relationship marketing – is vital to success.
How you go about it depends on your business, and the kinds of people you want to reach.
Let’s look at the company that provides wholesale screen-printed T-shirts and canvas bags as well as high-end embroidered shirts and caps.
One set of customers is retailers that want to provide inexpensive, colorful T-shirts for resale. Where would you, Mr. Screen Printer, find those kinds of people?
Another group of potential customers could be found in the professions – lawyers, for instance – who want quality golf shirts with their company name discreetly embroidered over the left breast that firm members can wear in informal gatherings.
How can you connect with people in that group?
What about non-profit organizations? Event organizers? Who else needs to know about your product? How do you reach them?
Once you’ve got your list of networking groups, how do you take advantage of that social capital?
• Be consistent. You can’t show up one time and expect to drive droves of business through your front door. (This is also true with other forms of marketing.)
• Have plenty of business cards available to hand out.
• Prepare and practice your elevator speech. Elevator speeches are so called because you should be able to say who you are and what you do in the time it takes to ride an elevator to your destination.
• Collect business cards. Write on the back where and when you met the person. Then follow up with a note. E-mail is better than nothing, but a quick, hand-written note shows that you care.
Is all that humanity giving you the willies? OK, go high tech. There are plenty of online business-networking sites as well – about 25 million of them.
High touch is looking better all the time.
Are you a bad luck magnet? September 19, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Life coaching.Tags: bad luck, coach, good karma, good luck, Law of Attraction, positive attitude, positive energy
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Jackie Harder
Are you a “bad luck” magnet?
Do you expect the worst, so you won’t be disappointed? Or does nearly everything go your way? Do you see the bright side in everything that happens to you?
Either way, I’d bet a week’s salary that you get exactly what you expect.
Why? It’s call the Law of Attraction, based on the law of physics that states that whatever energy we put out – negative or positive – is matched by more of the same.
Consider the tuning fork – a simple metal two-pronged fork whose tines resonate at a specific pitch when struck against a surface – used to by musicians to tune their instruments.
Put a hundred thousand tuning forks, all set to vibrate at the different frequencies of the musical scale, in a stadium. Strike one fork – the A, for example – and all the other A’s in the stadium will resonate. Not the B-flats or C’s…just the A’s.
This is the Law of Attraction, and it applies equally to your personal life as to your business life.
Like attracts like, so if your mood or feeling is positive, you will attract positive things in your life. The reverse is surely true as well.
To bring “good luck” or “good karma” into our lives, we need to change the way we feel about it, and how we express it to ourselves.
There are three words we need to remove from our vocabulary: Don’t, not and no.
If you go to Google and type in “No football,” what will be pop up on the screen? If you say to your pet, “No treat,” what word is it going to hear?
Same thing applies to the positive and negative energy you put out.
If you say, “I don’t want to lose this account; I don’t want to cry in front of the boss; I don’t want to be broke,” the message – the energy – you’re sending out is “lose,” “cry” and “broke.”
By focusing on your “don’t wants,” that’s exactly what you’ll get back.
When you change the words, you also will change the energy and your frame of mind.
“I want this to keep and grow this account. I want to be calm. I want my life to be filled with abundance.”
Something like this has happened to all of us: Our alarm doesn’t go off and our first thought is, “Oh, man, is THIS going to be a rotten day!”
And sure enough, it is.
We stub our toe getting out of bed, we burn the toast, we lose our keys, the car has a flat and on and on.
We need to learn to use the Law of Attraction deliberately, tap into it and make it work for us.
Here’s a three-step formula to do just that:
- Identify your desire. We’re not good at this; we’re better at saying what we don’t want. But we can figure out what we do want by knowing what we don’t want.
Hate your job? Keep focusing on that and nothing will improve. Instead, try imagining your perfect job. What kind of work would you do? Who are the people you would work with? How much money would you make? What would your environment look like? And most of all, how would it feel to have that perfect position?
- Raise your energy. Give it attention, energy and focus, because the Law of Attraction says “you attract to yourself whatever you give your attention and energy to, whether wanted or unwanted.”
- Allow it. This is the most important step of the three – and the most challenging.
What is allowing? It’s the absence of doubt, which is negative energy. If strong desire meets strong doubt, nothing happens. The moment you shift your energy to the positive is the moment you start to attract the positive to your life.
Try it. What do you have to lose, except “bad luck”?
Need help? Ask a coach!
Reinventing yourself September 7, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Life coaching.Tags: bank loan, coaching, education, fame, following your passion, get stuck, goal, incentive, lifelong dream, motivation, plan of action, reinventing self, resources, service to others, starting your own business, success
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Jackie Harder
QUESTION: I’m convincing myself that now is the time to reinvent, so that when the economy improves, I’ll be poised to do something new and exciting. How do I do that? How do I go completely out of the box?
ANSWER: Great questions and oh-so-appropriate on this Labor Day 2009! And here are some more, ones I use with all new my coaching clients, to help them figure out where they want to be.
Write down your answers to these questions. Be spontaneous; often the first thing you write down is your most compelling answer. But be thoughtful as well. Make sure your list is as complete as possible.
- Where do you get your energy, your “juice” for life?
Is it helping other people? Speaking in public? Do you get your juice by expressing yourself artistically, in words, music, movement or through building things with your hands?
- What is your gift that you’d feel great about orienting your life around? What is your magic? What is it about you that draws the most compliments from people?
- What motivates you?
Interestingly enough, lots of people have trouble with this question. Money, fame, love, security, respect, admiration and service to others are a few examples. As with all these questions, there are no wrong answers.
- What are your strongest resources?
This could be many things – your faith, money in the bank, a supportive partner, and the ability to take risks and learn.
- What is one of your lifelong dreams that’s worth living, starting now? What are you deferring until “things get better”?
- What’s holding you back?
It could be external things – other people’s needs or opinions or lack of money, for example – as well as internal, such as fear and lack of faith in yourself.
Take a broad overview to your answers to all these questions. See what naturally fits together, how they build on each other.
What direction do you see in the picture you’ve just created?
Now it’s time to start researching.
Can you make the amount of money you want by following your passion, using your gift? Are there companies who pay people to do what you want to do? If not, would starting your own business be a profitable course of action?
Talk to people who are doing what you’d like to do. Get their input. Ask them what they’d do differently and what they didn’t expect as they followed their dream.
What resources do you need to move forward? It could be more education, a bank loan, relocation or something completely different.
Once you’ve determined where you want to go — literally and figuratively — you need to figure out how to get there.
Your map will be your plan of action.
Determine when you want to achieve your large goal and reverse engineer your path to it.
Break your “bigs” into “littles” – give yourself three to five specific smaller goals to reach at established intervals within that larger time frame.
Success with smaller goals leading toward your larger ones will give you the incentive to move forward.
Make sure your goals have some “stretch” to push you to the next level.
Continually review your plan. Conditions and people change, and your plan has to reflect that.
If you get stuck, ask yourself why. What’s preventing you from moving forward and how do you overcome that?
For assistance in creating a map or following it, consult a coach.
A “well, duh!” moment August 26, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Life coaching.Tags: adaptation, bilingual, business, challenges, change, changing demographics, declining revenues, discrimination, employability, Hispanic, minority, relationships, skill set, Spanish, tourism
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Jackie Harder
You’ve heard, no doubt, of the “a-ha” moment, when you hear something that really resonates with you, that makes you stop in your tracks with wonder.
I had its first cousin — a “well, duh!” moment — this weekend while attending the Florida Governor’s Conference on Tourism at the Fountainbleau Hotel on Miami Beach.
One of the presenters in an industry panel said, “We have to adapt to what’s in front of us.”
Well, duh!
It’s such a simple, basic truth, but I’m continually amazed at the number of people who just flat out don’t get it.
Adaptation is not just a good thing — it’s vital to our survival, as individuals and as business people. But so many people are still dealing with what is behind them or fretting about what’s ahead (or both) that they lose sight of what’s right in front of their faces.
What’s in front of them could be declining revenues or imploding relationships or changing demographics or any number of life’s challenges.
But instead of adapting to those changing conditions, they harp on the real or imagined slights from their past. They nurse grudges based on off-hand remarks that people don’t even remember making. They fret about all the horrible things that could happen sometime in the indeterminate future.
And in the process, they lose the now, what’s right in front of them, and fail to make the most of it.
Take, for example, the man who’s angry because the job he wants requires him to be bilingual…and he isn’t.
He refuses to recognize the fact that Hispanics are the largest and fastest growing minority in this country. He chooses to be a victim, wants to sue for discrimination.
How much easier his life would be if, instead, he could choose to see this as a golden opportunity to improve his skill set and employability by learning another language.
Not only is he not adapting to what’s in front of him, he’s actively fighting it. Why? What, ultimately, does he gain from the battle? I would guess anger, hostility, an ulcer, an ugly attitude and sleepless nights, to name a few.
He’s certainly not going to get that job he covets.
Persuasive writing August 23, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Communication.Tags: Communication, editing, humor writing, newspapers, Persuasive writing, satire, writing, writing editorials, writing letters to the editor
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Jackie Harder
My coach sent me a copy of a letter to the editor she was planning to submit.
“Can you whittle this down to 500 words?” she wanted to know. Quick check of the document — it was nearly 1,700 words, more than three times the size of the final letter.
Holy smokes! That’s one heck of a lot of whittling!
Fortunately, whittling is something I did in my nearly 30-year career as a writer, editor and publisher in the newspaper business.
After the first pass, I got her letter down to 679 words — still too long for her purposes, but a heck of a lot closer than the original. I sent it back to let her fine tune the rest to get it where she wanted it to be.
Here are some tips to keep in mind to make your persuasive writing its most effective:
- Check the guidelines. Most newspapers have a word limit. Many will not publish third-party letters (your letter to a senator, for instance, even if you submit it).
- Remember your audience. Your language will be different if you’re writing for a professional journal than for a newspaper.
- Keep it short. Attention spans just aren’t what they used to be.
- Keep it simple and focused. Pick one point and stick to it.
- Be passionate, but be logical. Back up your arguments with facts. If you’re trying to change someone’s mind, “Because I said so” won’t cut it.
- Attack the position, not the person. While name-calling may be fun, ultimately it serves no purpose other than to give a momentary thrill. Remember – some day you may need the support of the person you’ve just called an idiot. This is especially true if you live in a small town where you undoubtedly will run in to your “victim.”
- Anticipate objections. Know the arguments of the “other side” and defuse them up front.
- Watch out for humor. The written word is pretty unforgiving. Your readers can’t see you wink or smile. Very few writers can do satire or humor well, even the professionals.
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Let it age. Go ahead and vent — get it all out and off your chest. Then let it sit for 24 hours. Go back and look at it with a more dispassionate eye.
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Edit, edit, edit. Yes, you’re the author and yes, this is your baby. It’s fine to have pride of ownership, but no writer is perfect. Make each word count. Make sure it says what it wants to say. Check for spelling and grammar.
Who’s running your business? August 17, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Corporate coaching, Management.Tags: behavior, bosses, business, business decisions, coaching, customer service, economy, front-line leadership, front-line workers, Internet, Management, managers, profitability, restaurants, staff
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Jackie Harder
It’s become a lunchtime ritual at this pricey establishment.
Patron: “I’ll have a cappuccino.”
Waiter: “Our cappuccino machine is broken.”
Patron, who’s heard this story for at least five years, adds a new twist to the dialog: “Oh. OK. I’ll just go to Restaurant X and get my coffee there.”
Waiter, getting defensive: “Those espresso machines cost a fortune.” Brief pause, then comes the kicker: “Besides, the staff doesn’t like making cappuccinos.”
Oh really. And here I thought it was all about the customer…not the staff.
What can you say? The inmates have taken over the asylum.
Maybe those machines are expensive. Maybe the drinks are a pain in the butt to make. Maybe it’s not the staff’s convenience that’s driving the decision, but something else entirely.
But if your patrons want espresso drinks – or anything else, for that matter – and you can justify the expense, should the staff’s attitude matter?
All company owners and managers want to treat their staffs well, hear their input. But running a business is not a hobby, nor is it a staff-driven popularity contest.
While this example is about restaurants, there are plenty of other businesses out there that fall into the same hole.
How about the doctor’s office? A woman with a risky pregnancy wanted to take her records to her new specialist, and the woman who answered the phone (clerk? nurse? cleaning lady?) got aggressive.
“What’s the matter?” she demanded. “Why are you going to another doctor? Isn’t Doctor Z good enough for you?”
Again – who’s running this joint? Sometimes you wonder if the boss is asleep at the switch.
I’ve heard enough similar stories about doctors’ offices that I’m convinced there is a special school where these front-line workers are taught how to be arrogant, offensive and unimaginably condescending.
Either that, or these dragons were born that way.
And it’s not just restaurants and doctors’ offices. They are legion.
Fortunately for local economies everywhere, many companies do have good customer service. Otherwise we’d all be doing business over the Internet.
Yes, you can get mad at a computer also, but you know most bumps along the way are due to operator error (that’s you).
But this screed is less about customer service and more about bosses who, for whatever reason, have lost touch with the front of the house.
The most charitable explanation: They’re not listening to what their employees are saying to their customers. They’re not working the floor themselves. They’re not talking to their customers to see how well the company is meeting their expectations.
The worst-case scenario: The bosses are jerks themselves and their employees are just passing that attitude on to an unsuspecting public. Or these bosses are simply tired of pushing that boulder up a hill and just give in and go along rather than fire everyone.
Of course, the public as a whole is pretty savvy and it won’t be long before the jerks lose their customers and the inmates lose their asylum.
- Jackie Harder
Who’s running your shop?
Don’t panic! August 10, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Life coaching.Tags: avoid panic, coaching, controlling expenses, cost-cutting, credit card debt, debt, increase revenue, losing your job, reduce expenses, saving money
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Jackie Harder
The news these days is filled with economic doom and gloom. Businesses are cutting back, foreclosures are going through the roof and workers are being laid off.
What can any of us do?
We have basic two choices: We can run around like our hair is on fire, or we can take action.
Panic never helps. All it does is distract us from what needs to be done.
What specifically needs to be done depends on your circumstances, but it’s always a good idea to start with taking stock.
Grab a pen and paper, or pull up a blank Word document on your computer, and make a list of everything that troubles you.
Don’t try to put it in order; just write it down as it comes to you. Keep going until you’ve run dry.
When it’s done, can you find any commonalities? For instance, are you worried about losing your job or business? Are your expenses going through the roof? Is your debt load crushing you?
Group them together and prioritize them.
Ask yourself, “What can I do about this?”
If you’re a “wage slave” struggling to pay your bills, where can you save money?
Look at where you’re spending now and come up with a list of how you can cut back. There are literally hundreds of ways you can cut back on expenses.
Here are a few: Shop around for a cheaper interest rate on your credit cards. Cook your own meals. Buy store brands and generic drugs wherever possible. Look for the most inexpensive fuel you can find. See if you can get better deals on your car and home insurance.
At the same time, figure out how you can earn more money. If you ask for a raise, be sure you have something to offer – increased revenue or reduced expenses – to improve the company’s bottom line.
Be bold: Ask for a piece of whatever you can save the company or a percentage of the new money you help bring in. The worst the boss can tell you is “no.”
What do you do for fun? Can your parlay a hobby into another source of income?
The same type of planning works for businesses also.
Where can you cut your expenses, without harming your bottom line? Remember, too much cost-cutting can leave you unprepared when the economy rebounds.
What extra avenues can you explore to bring in more revenue?
These are fantastic times to break out of your old habits and old ways of thinking. Stretch yourself; try things you haven’t tried before.
Also reconsider those things that you have tried but didn’t work. Who knows – maybe you were just ahead of the times, and now those concepts will pay off.
If you need assistance and support, consult a coach.
Are you a good listener? August 6, 2009
Posted by Jackie in Business coaching, Communication, Life coaching.Tags: active listening, coaching, combative listening, disconnected, giving advice, integrity, listening, multi-tasking, passing judgment, rude
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Jackie Harder
This is true-or-false quiz for good listeners only. Ready?
1. One of the most important things you can do when you’re listening to someone is keep your mouth shut.
2. In this busy, multi-tasking world, it’s OK to work on your computer and listen to someone at the same time.
3. Detailing your own story lets the other person know you have something in common.
4. To keep the conversation moving smoothly, a good listener mentally prepares his comments while the other person is talking.
5. When you break in on someone’s comment, it means you’re excited and enthusiastic about the conversation.
6. When people are struggling with a problem, a good listener generously offers a nugget of advice.
7. People mean what they say.
8. Lean away from people or sitting back in your chair to let people know you respect their personal space.
9. It’s best to repeat, word for word, what someone has said to you to make sure you’ve got it right.
10. If you make positive noises during a conversation, the other person will automatically assume you agree with them.
Here are the answers:
1. False. The other person wants to know you’re listening to them, and an appropriate word or two in the right place tells people you’re paying attention. Ongoing silence on your part could indicate that you don’t care or that you’re judging them.
2. False. It’s not OK to pound away on the keyboard when someone is talking to you. You may be able to type and hear what’s going on at the same time, but you are not listening to what you’re hearing. True listening requires your full attention.
If you’re working on something important and can’t be interrupted, say so and set a time to talk later.
3. False. It’s not about you. If you’ve got something pertinent to add from your own experience, say it quickly and move the conversation back to the other person.
4. False. A good listener pays close attention to what the other person is saying, and you can’t do that when you’re busy crafting your own response. “Combative listening” is not only counterproductive, it’s unattractive.
5. False. Interrupting someone doesn’t mean you’re enthusiastic – it means you’re rude.
Worse, it gives people the impression that they and their comments are unimportant…or at least far less important than whatever it is you want to say.
6. False. Most people don’t want unsolicited advice; they want to be heard. And if someone does ask your advice, make sure they really mean it.
7. False. Doesn’t mean they’re lying, of course, although that’s possible. Maybe something else is going on beneath the words, or that they’re having trouble expressing themselves. Depending on the conversation and the individuals there are many ways to respond if you think the other person does not mean what she’s saying.
8. False. Leaning back shows you’re disconnected from the conversation and uncaring. So does crossing your arms, turning away, answering your cell phone, looking out the window, texting someone, checking your watch and responding to e-mails.
9. False. Repeating a conversation word for word makes you sound like a recorder. If you’re unclear about what’s been said, rephrase his comments in your own words to ensure understanding.
10. False. “Uh-huh,” “Wow,” “I see” and similar comments only means you’re paying attention. You’re not compromising your integrity, or changing your opinion, by nodding your head.
